Making friends in our 30s (and beyond) can feel surprisingly daunting. Whether it’s due to busy schedules, established routines, or the hesitancy to step outside our comfort zones, finding new social connections often seems more difficult as we age. But here's the truth: It doesn't have to be.

The Power of a Simple "Hi"

One of the easiest ways to meet new people is by simply saying, "hi." It might sound overly simplistic, but sometimes, the best way to start a conversation is by just starting. Whether you're at the gym, a local coffee shop, or an online gaming session, the first step is breaking the ice.

Being social doesn’t always require grand gestures or long conversations right off the bat. A quick "hi" or a friendly comment about something you have in common can open the door to a more meaningful connection. The key is to be open, present, and willing to engage. Everyone’s in the same boat when it comes to making friends, and you’ll be surprised how many people are just waiting for someone to say hello.

Friendships Take Work

We all know that maintaining relationships is more challenging than it seems. Life pulls us in different directions—careers, family obligations, personal goals—often making it difficult to carve out time for friends. The older we get, the busier our lives become.

Yet, friendship is much like a garden: it requires attention, patience, and effort to thrive. If we don’t make the effort to reach out, send a message, or make time for a coffee (or gaming) session, those connections can fade away. And that’s the crux of it—making time is essential. Even if it's just scheduling an hour each week to chat, play a game together, or catch up on life, showing up is what counts.

For example, I have been alone for most of my life and have few friends. The best luck I had making friends came from my time in the Marines and my experience gaming. As a homebody, I prefer staying in rather than going out for a drink or dinner. I have a family, a business, and school commitments that demand much of my time. But I’ve learned that blocking out time for leisure is crucial. I can mesh socialization with my favorite activity—gaming—and it’s been the easiest way for me to stay connected with friends.

The Pros and Cons of Being Alone

Solitude isn't necessarily a bad thing. There are definite pros to spending time alone. It allows you to recharge, focus on personal goals, and enjoy hobbies without distractions. Many people thrive in their own company and find peace in moments of solitude.

However, too much time spent alone can lead to feelings of isolation. According to Positive Psychology, loneliness occurs when there's a gap between desired social interactions and actual ones, leading to negative impacts on both mental and physical health. Prolonged loneliness is linked to increased risks of depression, anxiety, and even physical health issues like heart disease.

Statistics back this up: According to the Campaign to End Loneliness, lacking social connections is as damaging to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Lonely people are also more likely to suffer from cognitive decline and have a 26% higher risk of dying prematurely. This shows how vital it is to maintain regular social interactions to protect our mental and physical well-being.

Filling the Gaps with Gaming

This is where gaming can play an important role. If you're like many people who find it tough to carve out time for socializing in person, online gaming can be a fantastic alternative. Gaming provides a space to meet people from all walks of life, while sharing a common goal or interest. It also allows you to bond over a shared experience without the pressure of face-to-face interaction.

For those of us over 30, online gaming communities like Elder Elo offer an excellent opportunity to connect with others who share the same love of gaming. Without divulging personal information, I’ve witnessed many insightful and deeper conversations just by being in Elder Elo. These range from venting, to sharing space, or simply having someone to talk to about our day.

Ideally, we want to surround ourselves with people who just get it—without the hostilities that often run rampant in Overwatch's social component. At Elder Elo, we aim to harness the best parts of socializing while still enjoying the game. Our routine daily check-ins and our soon-to-start weekly game nights can assist in fostering more meaningful connections, ultimately helping combat loneliness too.

Share Your Experience

Have you found it difficult to make friends as you’ve gotten older? What tips or experiences have helped you maintain friendships or make new ones? I'd love to hear your thoughts! Feel free to share your own stories in the comments section below or join our community at Elder Elo to connect with others who are navigating the same challenges. Together, we can create meaningful connections and combat loneliness.

Making friends after 30 doesn’t have to be a daunting task. Sometimes, all it takes is a simple "hi," an open mind, and a willingness to put in the effort. While there are benefits to being alone, we all need connection. Whether it's meeting in person or through online platforms like gaming, maintaining relationships is worth the effort—and can greatly enrich your life.